1 Peter Chapter 3 Pt. 3 Instructions For Christian Husbands & Wives.

We took 2 posts to examine what the Spirit of God guided Peter to write concerning the God ordained family order.

We learned that marriage is between one man and one woman for life. The husband has been set in authority over his wife, not by virtue of any inherent superiority. Rather, this is the family order that God specified.

We looked at a few examples of godly wives such as Sarah and Hannah. 

After Adam and Eve sinned, marriage was marred.

Genesis 3:16  Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee. 

The family order instituted by God was perverted by the fall of Adam and Eve. Genesis 3 is where we read about God holding them to account for their sins. 

God pronounced judgment that is a direct result of their choice to disobey God and listen to the voice of the serpent. 

God's judgment upon Eve was the sorrow and travail associated with bearing children. 

Furthermore, she will not always have a heart willing to submit to her husband's leadership. 

A wife will want to be the dominant one in the marriage relationship, and this creates conflict. 

Meanwhile, Adam's tendency will be to put his wife back into her place instead of lovingly leading her. 

From the point of their sin, these points of conflict have been built into marriage. However, when a husband or a wife, submit themselves to the Lord, marriage becomes sweet and precious as God intended it to be.

Ideally, both husband and wife will repent of their sins, and call upon the Lord Jesus Christ to save them, and He will. 

The regenerating work of the Spirit of God imparts a new life through the new birth, and God writes His laws on our heart and gives us a desire to obey them.  

As we learn to walk with God and yield to His Spirit, the fruit of the Spirit becomes more evident in what we say and do. 

Thus, the marriage of a Christian husband and wife, can be wonderful, beautiful sweet relationship that honors God. 

Today, Peter has something to say to husbands. We will also look to the apostle Paul for additional guidance from God for husbands. 

Husbands must dwell with wives according to knowledge. 

1 Peter 3:7  Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 

The word "likewise" means just as God wants our wives to live in subjection, here is how He wants us to treat our wife.

First, a husband is to dwell with his wife according to knowledge. 

Part of the knowledge includes remembering that his wife may tend to usurp his role by leading. 

And, part of it is that he may tend to be overbearing in responding to his wife. 

Mutual love and respect between husband and wife. 

1 Corinthians 7:3  Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 

A husband must "render due benevolence" to his wife. This is something God lays on the husband so that his heart is right in his interaction with her. 

Benevolence is a husband having a heart full of good will toward his wife. God mandates that this attitude be cultivated by both husband and wife.

A right submission and love in a Christian marriage. 

Colossians 3:18-19  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 19)  Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 

Paul captures both aspects of the marriage relationship. Wives are to submit to their husband because this is pleasing to God. 

Husbands are to love our wives and not become bitter toward them. We are not to be irritated or or frustrated with our wives.

The Holy Spirit directed Paul and Peter to remind Christian husbands and wives how God wants us to interact with each other.  

This is necessary instruction because of the fall of man into sin, and the introduction of potential conflict in marriage relationships. 

Ephesians 5:22-25  Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23)  For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. 24)  Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25)  Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 

The apostle Paul gives even more instruction from God regarding the marital relationships. 

Once again, we see the submission of a wife to her husband is stressed, because this is what God ordained. 

The reason given is that the husband is the head of his wife as this mirrors our relationship with the Lord. 

Christians cannot have many masters, for Christ is our Master (See Luke 16:9-13; Matthew 23:8-10).

Husbands are to love our wives as Christ loved His church and gave Himself for it. This is a sacrificial love that puts her needs over our own. 

It is an enduring love like the love Jesus has for us. It is love that is patient, kind, longsuffering and abiding. 

A Christian husband and wife are both heirs of eternal life. 

1 Peter 3:7  Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. 

Peter also reminds husbands to give honor to our wives, as to the weaker vessel. Giving honor to our wife means using our skills and abilities to provide for her, and to protect her. 

It is giving due respect to her, delighting in her, and placing full trust and confidence in her as our faithful and loving helpmeet. 

A wife is generally a physically weaker vessel and a husband must provide her protection, a place of safety, and shelter from both the elements and the world. 

Peter warns both husbands and wives of the importance of maintaining the family order as prescribed by God. If one or both fail in this, their prayer lives will be hindered. 

1 Peter 1:3=4  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again unto a lively hope by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4)  To an inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth not away, reserved in heaven for you.

A Christian husband and wife are both equally, heirs of eternal life through repentant faith in Jesus Christ. 

Peter reaches back to the first chapter, and the resurrection hope that each believer in Christ has been given. We have an incorruptible eternal inheritance that is waiting for us in heaven.

This inheritance is for a Christian husband and wife, so the submission of a wife to her husband and a husband's love and care of his wife, is designed to reflect the beauty of what awaits us. 

The Devil knows exactly how to attack a Christian couple. He will try to tempt a wife to usurp her husbands authority because this creates conflict in the home. 

He will try to goad the husband into responding harshly, because this creates conflict in the home.

This is why both husband and wife must pray for the will of God to be done in us and in our spouse. 

This is why a Christian husband and wife must attend a solid, Bible preaching church, where God's word and order for the family is upheld. 

May the Lord strengthen Christian husbands and wives around the world, so that our marriages bring honor to God and reflect the reality of Christ in us, the hope of glory.

Bob